Dentist: "I'm determined to get this done today!"

Me: "From your seat, it's easy to be determined."

Posted by: Ted at 06:58 PM | category: Square Pegs
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When you have toddlers, and they reach that perfect age - it doesn't last long - and you walk through the door and they come running to give Daddy a hug. And basically you get a full-speed head butt right in the balls.

At that age, they're young enough to think you fell to the floor to play.

Posted by: Ted at 05:25 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Red Sox win the world series. Let the whining begin anew until sometime after 2100.

Posted by: Ted at 11:38 AM | category: Square Pegs
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My mind is going about a gazillion miles an hour this morning. Lots to do at work, my basement looks like a cold-war era missile maintenance shop, and I get to go see my dentist again this afternoon.

As I was pulling onto our street the other day, a old and beat up red ford mini-station wagon was coming out. It had those new spinning hubs. A bit of Mookie-wisdom: "Before spending hundreds of dollars tricking out your car, have a car worth more than hundreds of dollars."

This picture made me laugh.

My wife thinks it's unusual that I say things like "I ran out of epoxy". According to her, most people wouldn't use it up before it went bad. I'm waiting for a good moment to tell her that the next time I'm buying epoxy, I'm getting a gallon of resin, a quart of hardener, plus a bunch of extras like microballons and milled fiberglass. And for completeness' sake, I highly recommend this guy for all your adhesive needs.

Superglue. Most folks buy those little tiny containers, the hobby-grade stuff I use comes in 8 ounce bottles. Thick and thin viscosity too.

Since I seem to be stuck on the subject (*owww*), I was digging through my adhesives box, and noticed that I had:

Oldest daughter Robyn went to the hospital in an ambulance the other day. She collapsed at school and the doctors say it was dehrydration. My diagnosis is stupidity so I yelled at her on the phone to take better care of herself and we both felt better. So anyway, she's done at the hospital and gets a ride back to campus, walks into her room, and has this conversation with her roomie:

Roomie: "Were you really taken to the hospital?"

Robyn: "Yeah."

Roomie: "I guess you don't wanna go out partying tonight."

Robyn: "Here's your sign."

Posted by: Ted at 06:00 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Do you actually USE all those adhesives..or is this like a man thing where more is better? Perhaps that question should go to your wife?

Posted by: Catt at October 28, 2004 09:31 AM (UUS/P)

2 LOL Each has a specific purpose and there's a reason I use certain ones at different times. I might do a post on glues. If you think political flame wars are bad, you should see the epoxy vs. wood glue schism (about as bad as DOS vs Unix).

Posted by: Ted at October 28, 2004 09:43 AM (blNMI)

3 Ted, please don't go around spray-painting spiders. Or if you do, please don't tell us.

Posted by: Victor at October 28, 2004 10:31 AM (L3qPK)

4 And for more unsolicited advice: Perhaps you should get daughter Robyn a Camelbak for Christmas. Heh.

Posted by: Victor at October 28, 2004 09:01 PM (etHvD)

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I found them while searching for old baseball cards, but there's so much more. Hours of fascination for those with a love of history.

The US Library of Congress Online Collections Finder.

Posted by: Ted at 05:43 AM | category: History
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I post something for my wife, just because.

Lady Love

Lady love, your love is peaceful
Like the summer's breeze
My lady love, with love that's tender
As a baby's touch
You give me all of the things
That I need so much
You're my world, lady love

Lady love, your love is cooling
Like the winter snow
My lady love, with love that's cozy
As a fire's glow
And I keep on needing you, girl
A little more and more
And I thank you, my lady love

You know, it's not easy to keep love flowing smooth
People are people and they all have their moods
But it's so nice just to have someone like you
Who wants a smooth and easy thing
And all the good times that it brings

My lady love, you've been with me
Through all of my ups and downs
My lady love, I once was lost
But now with you I'm found
You got the love I need
And I want to stay around
Heaven sent you down, my lady love

Let me tell you that it's not easy to keep love flowing smooth
You know, people are people, they all have their moods
But it's so nice just to have someone like you
Who wants a smooth and easy thing
And all the good times and the joy that it brings

My lady love, you've been with me
Through all of my ups and downs
And my crazy turn-arounds
My lady love, you got the love I need
So stay around
Heaven sent my lady love

Lady love, sweet lady love
You are so good to me
Lady love, like a warm summer breeze
(So glad I found my lady love, lady love)
(so glad I found my lady love, lady love)

Written by V. Gray and S. Marshall
Performed by Lou Rawls

Posted by: Ted at 05:28 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Where I work, we've got this one elevator that creaks and groans and is generally cranky. During the day, when things are busy, it's kinda fun to watch people's expressions when it shows up and they get on, because more than a few are convinced that their next ride will be a nonstop Express to the basement. Just for fun I've considered hanging a sign in there that explains that jumping up and down in a falling elevator is a myth.

In the wee hours of the morning, when I arrive, the damned thing is just plain creepy. About every third day it's the one that shows up when I press the up button. I never worry about the big plunge, because then it would be repaired or replaced, and it doesn't want that. It wants to bide it's time, and every once in a while, when no one is looking, it feeds. One person at a time.

Posted by: Ted at 05:21 AM | category: Links
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I talked about it here, and the weather is looking very very good. By friday I should have some pictures of what I'll be flying. For sure, the Hot Jets rocket will be taking flight at least once.

Posted by: Ted at 08:35 PM | category: Rocketry
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1 Total eclipse was awesome here in gaaaawgia Rhett!

Remember to wear your seat belt

Posted by: Tricia at October 27, 2004 10:26 PM (lRTFS)

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Go ahead, you know you want to. I promise, it's safe for work.

Awwwwwww.

Posted by: Ted at 07:48 PM | category: Links
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Courtesy of the Library of Congress, 2,100 early baseball cards dating from 1887 to 1914.

And here's a nifty site that includes some 30,000 vintage baseball card photos (click the "OBC Specials" button), and an article about Topps, the all-time king of baseball cards, and some of their more obscure card sets and collections (click their "Library" button, then select the "Topps Insert, Test And Supplemental Baseball Issues 1949-1980"). It sounds dry, but there's a ton of interesting history to be found inside.

Years ago (1938 to be precise) four brothers, Abram, Ira, Joseph and Philip Shorin, erstwhile cigar manufacturers, established a chewing gum company in Brooklyn (where else?). Wanting to select a name that would let the public know how good their gum was and they settled on Topps (the extra "p" was for effect) and unwittingly created what was to become the largest bubble gum card entity in the Western Hemisphere. At some point, most probably toward the end of World War II, or just after, they began marketing their famous Bazooka bubble gum and yet another American institution was born. Looking for ways to increase product exposure, Abram hit upon the idea of packaging their bubble gum with trading cards. This was in 1948 and things have never been the same...

Posted by: Ted at 05:28 AM | category: History
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Check out the list at RetroCrush.

A rattle of the bones to Dave for pointing it out. I saw it in the comments at Vadergrrrl's place, and she has an excellent post on her personal favorite scary films too.

Posted by: Ted at 04:50 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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I've been tinkering with CSS lately at work, and using Rocket Jones and the Skunkworks as guinea pigs. This has been going on for quite a while, and the "Under Construction" signs will remain up for the forseeable future. So if you notice anything odd (like those damned gray boxes around various bits), well, it's me tweaking.

For some reason, I can twiddle and play at work but don't always see the changes until I get home.

Anyways, never mind the mad genius behind curtain #1, it's just me. Now maybe if I pull this level while twisting the that knob...

Posted by: Ted at 08:55 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Mad scientist. Check.
Creepy assistant. Check.
Pulsing brains and hearts. Check.
Homicidal monster. Check.
Splashing blood and gruesome gore. Check.
G-Men. Check.
Foreign spies. Check.
Busty babes in bra and panties or bikinis. Check.

So can someone please tell me why this movie is so damned dull?!?!?!?!?

Astro Zombies has a decent cast, and you'll probably recognize several of the actors. Robert Carradine stars as the evil scientist, but he's barely trying here. Robert Bagdad checks in as the odd assistant, and while he looks like an evil assistant, he spends a lot of time alternating between evil genius in his own right and bumbling idiot servant. Tura Satana of Faster Pussycat! Kill! Kill! is the head of an international ring of spies out to steal the doctor's secrets, but her acting is if anything even worse in this movie. The G-men are just annoying, and tend to die after long boring chase scenes. They're supposed to be the good guys, but such faceless drones that I really didn't care whether or not they lived or died.

I think the idea was to build suspense by dragging out the action, but the director had no real clue about how to really build tension. There wasn't a lot to work with either, because the script is bad, the acting is bad, the plot is bad, the sets are bad... The cars are nice though, it's fun to see yesterday's roads filled with Mustangs and Galaxys.

About three-fourths of the way into this movie, you can almost hear the director say "time to liven this mess up!" Suddenly spies and G-men start to get shot and stabbed, the monster starts to attack, the gore becomes more graphic, and characters actually run instead of meander around the screen. Not that any of it saves this bomb.

One part that made me laugh was that the monsters (the Astro Zombies), are powered by photoelectric cells stuck to their heads. Yep, solar powered evil. For nighttime badness, they also have a built in battery pack that recharges during the day. In one fight scene, a G-man manages to remove the battery pack from the monster. The monster grabs the G-man's flashlight, and we're treated to a long sequence where the monster is struggling through the back alleys of Los Angeles, trying to make it back to the doctor's secret laboratory, all the while holding the flashlight to his forehead!

An interesting bit of trivia, this movie was co-written and produced by Wayne Rogers - Trapper John of television's M*A*S*H. I'm curious to know how many times he's been punched for having a hand in this movie.

Simply put, this movie sucks, and not in a good way. Stay away from this one, unless you need the sleep. What a shame, because it had so much potential too.

Posted by: Ted at 11:45 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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Whoooo! This is quickly becoming the Tidy Bowl 2004 for the Rockets. Jim of Snooze Button Dreams has two reasons to celebrate: first, he beat me this week even though one of his receivers was on a bye, and he found a new job. Looks like you can afford a lap dance or two to celebrate your gridiron prowess, my man.

At least I know he won't be getting a happy lap from the the Rocket Jones Hot Jets cheerleaders, because these ladies are much too classy for that (and if I'm wrong ladies, let me know via email. Confidentiality promised. This definitely does not apply to Mookie.)

Wegglywoo, of On the Beach at the End of the World!
Dawn of Dawn Enterprises!
Stevie, of Caught In The XFire!
Helen, of Everyday Stranger!
annika, of annika's journal!
Cindy, of Dusting My Brain!
Mookie, of MookieRiffic!
Denita, of Who Tends The Fires!
Lynn S., of Reflections in d minor!
Susie, of Practical Penumbra!
Blogoline, of Blogoline's Journal!
Gir, of Your Moosey Fate!
Tink, of Flitting Here and There!
Sarah, of Trying To Grok!
Kat, of Mostly Fluff!
Big Hair, of Left & Right!
Jennifer, of Jennifer's History and Stuff!
Heather, of Angelweave!
Margi, of Margi Lowry!
Nic, of Shoes, Ships, and Sealing Wax!
Lemur Girl, of... uh, Lemur Girl!
LeeAnn, of The Cheese Stands Alone!

So who's up for next week? The undefeated Fire Ants! That's ok, because it just makes it sweeter when I stomp you like a Dolphin stomps a Ram or like a Bengal stomps a Bronco.

Who's this King of Fools anyways?

Posted by: Ted at 05:59 AM | category: Links
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Just for fun, I googled the phrase "Baseball Oddities" and here's a sampling of what popped up.

"Despite my enduring respect, there are many attributes of the game that make me scratch my head." -- Aaron Arkin.

Four things that don't really make sense: Pitchers that can't hit, arguing balls and strikes, coaches in uniforms and pitchers wearing a windbreaker when they run the bases.

Here's a quiz about odd baseball stats and trivia. It's tough, I only scored 6 correct out of 15!

In May, 2001, Baseball Digest printed an article about the Nine Strangest Major League Games. Good stuff.

This next one had me laughing. A Day at the Ballpark - with Middle-Schoolers. In it, the author talks about a surreal day watching the Oakland A's taking on the Boston Red Sox.

Middle schooler: How much for the sodas?

Vendor: Three dollars.

Middle schooler (with a very sarcastic look on his face): No, for reals, how much?

Vendor : (remains silent, but obviously thinking of a very bad word)

Posted by: Ted at 05:46 AM | category: History
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Last year they had a horrible accident on the pad that killed 21 scientists and technicians. This year, they made it. Congrats, mi Amigos!*

Thanks to both A.E. Brain and Interested Participant for pointing this out.

*Yes, I know Brazilians speak Portuguese, not Spanish. Work with me here.

Posted by: Ted at 12:08 PM | category: Space Program
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The new schedule is up.

Posted by: Ted at 06:10 AM | category: Links
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1 Still undefeated in the Jamboree!

Posted by: Tuning Spork at October 25, 2004 11:42 PM (OcLmo)

2 Just my luck that the Pengweenies are off to their worst start in my memory. And when they DO finally win one, it's against my second favorite and home team. At least we got to see the game. Sheesh!

I've had more of your logos on my page than my own.

Posted by: Catt at October 26, 2004 02:26 PM (UUS/P)

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I lost my wedding ring last monday afternoon. In all the fuss about the trip to the dentist, I'd forgotten about that. Fortunately, I found it again. With the cooler weather coming on, and the weight I've lost this year, my fingers are thinner and it just slipped off when I was putting something into my briefcase. A few discreet wraps of tape and that won't happen again.

I'm on my second ring because the first one wore out. I wear it constantly, except for when I'm working on my car. I've witnessed ugly things happen to people who wear rings while playing mechanic. I've no desire to personally experience them myself.

I lost the first ring too once, and then found it again. Back when Liz was in a wheelchair, we went to a restaurant and while we were sitting there I realized my ring was missing. I freaked. I had no idea when I'd last noticed it, and by the end of the meal Liz had calmed me down enough to just accept that sometimes crap like that happens.

After dinner, I helped Liz into the car then took the chair around back to load it up (we used a bike rack to carry it). I got her chair folded and secured, and for some reason I looked down and there at my feet was the ring. Major relief!

When we were first engaged, I told Liz to get whatever ring she wanted (we were living in different states at the time), and to get me a plain gold band. No engraving, no markings, just simple gold a little over 1/8" wide.

Anything bigger than that and you could do yourself damage...

I'm going to tell this story exactly like I've told it to Liz. I'm careful never to change it or embellish it, or she'd know it's bull. It's not... sorta. Or maybe it is. I've never confirmed or denied it, I just tell the story as is and let everyone make up their own mind. To this day, Liz still isn't sure if I'm pulling her leg about this.

Liz was out with a bunch of girlfriends at a bachelorette party. She wasn't driving, so I expected her to stagger through the door in the wee hours, drunk and disorderly.

A couple of my friends had come over to the house, and we weren't doing much of anything when the phone rang. It was the girls, asking us if wanted to join them at the bar for the party. Their real motivation was that even the designated drivers were hammered, and they needed rides home.

We drove over, it wasn't far, and went inside. It was kind of fun to be the only three guys partying with more than a dozen drunk women. We were having a good time, and then for reasons I'll never fathom I did the single stupidest thing I've ever done in my life.

I decided to recreate that scene in Officer and a Gentleman where Patrick Swayzie swallows an engagement ring. Of course, I didn't actually swallow it, I tucked it under my tongue before taking the drink. Of course, nobody believed that I'd actually swallowed it, and a few minutes later it miraculously reappeared on my finger, to no one's suprise.

Someone mentioned it though at the other table and soon a whole new batch of drunk ladies wanted to see it. Remember that scene?

Open mouth, stick out tongue, place ring carefully on tongue. Take looong drink and open mouth. Viola! No ring. Of course, I wasn't going to continue the scene and go hang myself in the bathroom. There's limits to what I'll do for my art.

Except that, to my horror, the damn ring somehow slipped to the back of my throat and I involuntarily swallowed it.

There's a reason we chew our food. The throat isn't all that big around, and although there's some flexibility, it's not built to deal with things like a ring of metal. The ring got stuck. I wasn't choking on it, but it was too far down to discreetly cough up. The look on my face instantly gave it away, and of course everyone knew I was bullshitting them. It became a game, where did Ted hide his ring. The women searched my mouth, my hands, my pockets, and I could have really enjoyed it all if not for the fact that I'd swallowed my freaking wedding band. I finally decided that "this too, shall pass" and instead of bringing it up, I'd swallow it down and bide my time for its reappearance. I took several large drinks and tried to work the ol' swallow magic. No joy. Not coming up, not going down.

A few minutes later, I'm outside in the parking lot with a good friend. He's holding a huge glass of water that he got from inside, even though he's convinced that I'm faking it and laughing his ass off at everyone else's reaction. He chattering away while I'm trying to redefine "productive cough". All I could think of is Liz being pissed off at me for being an idiot and the stories that the ER staff would be telling about me in the morning. Finally, in desperation I stuck my finger down my throat and managed to throw up on the hood of a Corvette.

Eureka! I gingerly pluck my ring from the puddle of yick and rinse it off with that glass of water. I put it back on my finger, poured the rest of the water on the 'vette to wash off my mess, and headed back inside. I felt stoopid, to say the least. I was amazed to find out that most of the folks thought I was full of crap when I told them what happened, even with my friend's eyewitness account. It was so confused that to this day Liz isn't certain about the actual events.

I'm not that damn stupid. That's my story, and I'm sticking to it.

Posted by: Ted at 05:22 AM | category: Boring Stories
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1 I believe ya! Even if it's just a neat story, believe me, I believe ya!

Posted by: Tuning Spork at October 26, 2004 12:01 AM (OcLmo)

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Cornelius Alexander McGillicuddy changed his last name and became forever known as Connie Mack. After eleven seasons as a catcher in the major leagues, he managed for a couple of years and then bought the Philadelphia Athletics in 1901. When New York Giants manager John McGraw called the Athletics "a white elephant nobody wanted," Mack adopted a white elephant as the team's logo, which the Athletics have used off and on ever since.

Connie Mack loved baseball, but he never let himself forget that it was a business.

... he once confided that it was more profitable to have a team get off to a hot start, then ultimately finish fourth. "A team like that will draw well enough during the first part of the season to show a profit for the year, and you don't have to give the players raises when they don't win," he said. The most famous example of Mack's tight-fistedness came on July 10, 1932, when the Athletics played a one-game series with the Cleveland Indians. To save train fare, Mack only brought two pitchers. The starting pitcher was knocked out of the game in the first inning, leaving only knuckleballing relief pitcher Eddie Rommel. Rommel pitched 17 innings and gave up 33 hits, but won the game, 18-17.

In the 1890's, the Baltimore Orioles were first a National League team before moving to the American League. Their 3rd baseman during those years was John McGraw. He displayed a talent for innovation within the game and his desire to win was fierce. Among his credits, he helped develop the hit-and-run and suicide squeeze play. McGraw was an excellent player, hitting over .320 nine seasons in a row and leading the majors in runs scored twice.

After retiring from the field, he took charge as manager of the New York Giants. In 31 years as manager, his teams won 10 pennants, finished second 11 times and took home three World Series trophies.

His 2,840 wins rank only behind Connie Mack in baseball history. On July 6, 1933, John McGraw came out of retirement to manage the NL in the first All-Star Game. He died less than a year later.

One interesting article I found while researching this talks about John McGraw and the Negro Leagues.

McGraw was a man ahead of his time. He tried to sneak a man past baseball's Color Barrier nearly fifty years before Branch Rickey. In 1901 as a manager of the old Baltimore Orioles McGraw brought second baseman Charlie Grant to training camp. Claiming that Grant was actually "Chief Tokohama," a Native American, McGraw hoped to use Grant's talents in the coming year's pennant chase. The problem with this was that Grant was by no means a Native American. He had played the previous year for the Columbia Giants, a Negro Leagues outfit. Charles Comiskey caught wind of this and the hammer came down. That season Charlie Grant again played for the Columbia Giants.

Posted by: Ted at 05:07 AM | category: History
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I found this over at Eros Blog (not safe for work):

Posted by: Ted at 03:02 PM | category: Links
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